A One Minute Nonsense Rhyme About Vegetables

there’s much ado about parsnips
and how do carrots sigh
I’d try to cheer up turnips
but the shallots made me cry
I helped a pickled gerkhin
chat up a sweet courgette
to the dismay of jersey royals
who’d not been roasted yet


Nonsense Rhyming Rhyme

I knew a man in Oswestry
who had an elbow for a knee
which bent the other way you see
but that was just the start
for inside he was messed up too
his blood was made of superglue
which ran through all his veins like goo
and stopped his plastic heart.

On his head instead of hair
he grew a tiny polar bear
which caused us all to stop and stare
each time he came to town
so it’s no surprise
he had four eyes
all made out of custard pies
and bootlaces made up his wrinkled frown.

Water Biscuits : a grammatically and rhythmically flawed nonsense rhyme

I have too many ginger nuts
whatever will I do?
I could feed them to the ducks I guess
but I don’t have a clue
if domesticated water fowl
enjoy eating biscuits too
but they could dip them in their tea
they’d be much easier to chew
or perhaps they’d prefer custard creams
just like me and you?