Pete The Pilchard

I know a pilchard
name of Pete
the angriest fish
you’d ever meet
I blamed it on
his main penchant
for quoting Brando
On The Waterfront

There Is No Band Playing In The Sky (chorus to an unfinished song for Lee Hazlewood)

do not let this old life pass you by
take the time to love and laugh and cry
even if there is sorrow
there is always a tomorrow
and there is no band playing in the sky

5-7-5 (take seventy-six : dandelions)

the dandelions
long to lose their golden youth
and dance on the wind

Oh gimme that old timey malt loaf

In a world that’s always changing
one thing of which I’m sure
is my love of Soreen fruity malt loaf
picked up at the corner store
sliced thick and spread with butter
or even Stork margarine
the finest cake in all the land
can’t compare to a piece of Soreen.

5-7-5 (take seventy-five : seeds)

the seeds have fallen
to sleep beneath the dry earth
waiting for the rain

The Ballad Of Thirty Two

Each and every Sunday
I write a little song
and every single Sunday
the words all come out wrong
so wrong in fact they’re numbers
I don’t know what to do
just last week I finished one
called I love 32

One Of The Lewises

I was standing like a Lewis
in the middle of the road
when a copper came
and slapped me on the bum
He took down my particulars
and said I’d catch me death
so I pulled up me pants
and ran home to my mum.

Bad Prayer Day

to the follicular gods
I send this prayer
please deliver me
from this fluffy hair

Amen…

5-7-5 (take seventy-four : sunset)

The dusk wipes away
the day’s primary colours
until tomorrow

Heraldry

I do not have a coat of arms
but if I did I’d like
a blue gorilla rampant
upon a Chopper bike
in his hand he’d gently hold
a smiling rubber duck
it might look silly on a shield
but I wouldn’t give a fig.